A little bit colder now...
Oct. 27th, 2005 02:54 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
trystinnIts definately getting colder here, especially at night. We have had so many wind storms, its not unusual for the power to go out several times a night. Each time the lights go out, the dogs get so upset, it amazes me. I cannot recall a time where previous dogs have reacted quite in this manner.
Our cat has become an indistinguishable blur of black fur against the black office chair he prefers, fluffier and fluffier until all I can see are his green eyes and perhaps those sharp white teeth if I can catch him yawning. The rabbits are similarly dressed in their winter finery - must finish making a smaller door for their hutch for the colder weather ahead.
Samhain is such a strange time of year for me. Not only is it a sort of universally pagan time for recognizing our dead, its a very personal time, as well. My older sister Annessa was born and died on October 26th, two years before my birth. My younger brother Shawn died on October 26th, of his 21st year. I cannot begin to separate Samhain from my personal grieving. Perhaps this is for the best, perhaps it is not. Either way, I notice I have a tendency to separate from others and remain a bit aloof until I get through these days. I wonder sometimes if enough time has passed that I might actually let myself backburner this memory of my siblings at Samhain, yet every year, without fail, my mother sends me an email reminding me. This year, the reminder comes with a bit of an apology for not getting together with my inlaws, as they have been invited to. Its not for me to judge her decision not to travel on these days, but I do wish that at some point she would see herself clear to enjoying these days instead of considering them an annual day of mourning.
In the past, I have sought out events to distract myself from this - Hecate Sickle was good for that. But given my involvement in British Tradition Wicca, I have been unable to participate for a few years, even to the point of attending. This year, our coven is not only celebrating Samhain together, we are Initiating one of our Outer Grove students. She is a wonderful woman, very wise, warm, funny - I am always happy to see her come visit our home, we are fortunate that she has relatives on the Island so we see her often. We are truly blessed to have her in our lives, and now, our Family.
I have been trying to think of a good Initiation present for her. Something personal, something homemade, something she can treasure. Unfortunately, my mind is a bit of a blank at present, all ideas welcome.
Our cat has become an indistinguishable blur of black fur against the black office chair he prefers, fluffier and fluffier until all I can see are his green eyes and perhaps those sharp white teeth if I can catch him yawning. The rabbits are similarly dressed in their winter finery - must finish making a smaller door for their hutch for the colder weather ahead.
Samhain is such a strange time of year for me. Not only is it a sort of universally pagan time for recognizing our dead, its a very personal time, as well. My older sister Annessa was born and died on October 26th, two years before my birth. My younger brother Shawn died on October 26th, of his 21st year. I cannot begin to separate Samhain from my personal grieving. Perhaps this is for the best, perhaps it is not. Either way, I notice I have a tendency to separate from others and remain a bit aloof until I get through these days. I wonder sometimes if enough time has passed that I might actually let myself backburner this memory of my siblings at Samhain, yet every year, without fail, my mother sends me an email reminding me. This year, the reminder comes with a bit of an apology for not getting together with my inlaws, as they have been invited to. Its not for me to judge her decision not to travel on these days, but I do wish that at some point she would see herself clear to enjoying these days instead of considering them an annual day of mourning.
In the past, I have sought out events to distract myself from this - Hecate Sickle was good for that. But given my involvement in British Tradition Wicca, I have been unable to participate for a few years, even to the point of attending. This year, our coven is not only celebrating Samhain together, we are Initiating one of our Outer Grove students. She is a wonderful woman, very wise, warm, funny - I am always happy to see her come visit our home, we are fortunate that she has relatives on the Island so we see her often. We are truly blessed to have her in our lives, and now, our Family.
I have been trying to think of a good Initiation present for her. Something personal, something homemade, something she can treasure. Unfortunately, my mind is a bit of a blank at present, all ideas welcome.
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no subject
Date: 2005-10-27 10:23 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-10-27 10:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-10-27 10:30 pm (UTC)In the deep of the sky, in Her vastness, He waits with open arms. Made of stardust and blood, the Darkness His comfort and domain.
Bone...
Date: 2005-10-27 11:06 pm (UTC)Of course, I own a human skull.
And a bone mala carved in the shape of human skulls.
And I wear a necklace made of the vertebrae of a snake.
I have to admit that people get nervous around me during the Dark of the year (not to mention the rest of the year actually, but Samhain to Yule seems to bring out my inner squick).
;-)
Re: Bone...
Date: 2005-10-28 01:34 am (UTC)Re: Bone...
Date: 2005-10-28 01:47 am (UTC)But I clean up ever so well, and then I relax, wear a t-shirt and things peek out, the tatoos show, and I start to talk about my dissertation...
It all goes downhill from there.
;-)
Re: Bone...
Date: 2005-10-28 05:16 pm (UTC)It's funny how it's always the little things that get people.
Re: Bone...
Date: 2005-10-28 06:08 pm (UTC)And then you know you're not alone.
;-)